Wedding Planning is Hard

 

Pardon the non-writing related update, but dangit I had a bad day Wednesday and I want to write a post about it. Which is double unfortunate because I woke up in a great mood. I had every plan to have a wonderful day.

Wednesday, it suddenly hit me that our wedding was a mere 4 1/2 months away, and that we still didn’t know where the ceremony was going to take place. We’re getting married on a Saturday in June. It’s kind of imperative that we put a deposit on a church sometime soon.

Brad’s family is very religious. Southern Baptist, specifically. They don’t want alcohol at our wedding reception, but that is not happening.

The one big request I am trying to guarantee is that we get married in a church by a (male) pastor (their request).

But oh my goodness. It’s kind of difficult when you’re planning a wedding in Texas when you live in a Virginia. I have only spoken with one church, but (no particular surprise), their requirement is pre-marital counseling. IN. PERSON.

We’re saving our money to MOVE to Texas this year. Not to pay $800 for both of us to fly down X 4 (it’s 4 separate sessions) = $3200 basically for marriage counseling! Uh, no!

The church we rarely frequent (it’s one of our flaws, okay) offers pre-marital counseling as well, but we have to make sure that it’s “approved” by this church we’re considering getting married at.

OH and the church will cost us $650 to use!

Maybe that’s an average number. I don’t know. I’ll be emailing more churches this week to compare.

It’s just unfortunate. If it were up to me, we’d double up on our reception space. Get married, reset, have a party. But I want my in-laws to come. And I don’t know if they will if we don’t say “I do” in a church of some kind.

I dunno. All of a sudden the realization of how close this was crept up on me. First and foremost, we NEED to know where we’re getting married at. But I also need to start looking at invitations, we still owe $1,000 on the reception hall. I’ve barely made a dent in paying off my dress (on a credit card) AND I need to buy a plane ticket to go home and get the alterations done (i.e. more $$$). Five, six months seems like such a long time. Four months, not so much.

Gahhhh. After the meltdown I had, I drank some wine, ate some Doritos (Nacho Cheese), strongly considered a trip to Krispy Kreme (but I held myself back), and unwound.

So in case you were wondering why I didn’t write a post yesterday, I was busy having a mental breakdown.


 

First guest post is up tomorrow! And then we’re back on track, promise.

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21 thoughts on “Wedding Planning is Hard

  1. Brad’s family has had their wedding, you and Brad need to have your own. Don’t under-estimate the impact that in-laws can have on a marriage, both for good and for bad. But what do I know, I’ve only be married the first time for 5 years, the second time for 12 years and the third time I am still married after 27 years.or 44 years of total marriage. So, please just ignore my red flag.

  2. When we went to marriage counseling, the minister brought up a lot of good points that we were too young and too in love to consider but I’ve often wondered if it wouldn’t have been easier to get those discussions and expectations out of the way before we were trying to make it, married with kids, new house, new roles etc. Then again, we’ve never been ones to do anything the easy way. I do think it’s important though, to sit down with your fiance and talk this out. It’s suppose to be amazing, firecrackers and fanfare to start you down your path together. You don’t want a lot of bad memories and resentment attached to it. What’s the point of having the biggest party of your life, if not to have fun!

  3. We’ve been married for just over 7 years, our plan was to go to Vegas with our immediate family and our parents said no BUT while both of our families did not want us to elope, they helped pay for our wedding so we could have the kind of wedding that they felt we should have. Our wedding was beautiful and I have no regrets but if our families had put limitations/expectations on us WITHOUT helping to make them happen – we would’ve just eloped.

    • Yeah my question last night to Brad was whether his parents could help pay for the church considering they’re the ones requesting it. He was all “I can pay for it” but that wasn’t the point I was trying to make lol. Besides that, I told him were not digging into our moving money to pay for the church.
      We’ll explore our other church options over the next week or two, and we’ll see.

    • I knoooowww.. But they don’t like being around it at all. It’s funny because Brad was a wild child when he got old enough. They were so strict and he just rebelled. His sisters though, rule followers for sure. One’s in college and has sworn off alcohol even when she’s 21. To each their own, but I’d prefer they didn’t judge people who like to indulge…

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